When you are struggling with living your life and are experiencing difficulties with grief, bereavement, anxiety, depression, emotional distress, it can feel isolating. A sense of being on your own, lonely, confused, loss of your identity and struggling with your self-worth. It can be an unsafe environment, being shutdown from others or on a continuous loop of anticipating threat or danger from others. Living becomes a daily grind on survival, just to get through it can be exhausting. The nervous system is on a hyper alert for any cues of threat and an awareness of triggers and walking on eggshells may be a constant way of living.
Counselling can offer a safe space by being in a calm nervous state of social engagement and offering a space for you to be yourself. This is created by being attune to your needs, connecting psychologically with you, speaking with a gentle tone of voice, actively listening to your story, showing open body language, creating an environment where you feel heard, understood and accepted for yourself.
Facial expression of eye contact, smiling, raising of eyebrows and nodding of the head can all omit a sense of being listened to and understood. Having another person witness your story without fear of judgement and offer an empathetic understanding that they get you, can be the start of connecting with them in a safe space.
Not feeling ok and being validated that your feelings are accepted without any conditions may be a new experience and the start of a journey of discovering yourself. When you feel safe, you can be free to be yourself.